scientist discover Microsoft(tm) brain   
03:39am 01/05/2008
 
mood: bored
scientist have recently discovered that Microsoft(tm) programs do actually have their brains. news come from a recent accident where one employee, who's name can not be disclosed, jumped out of a second floor window. Belief of this event being a suicide attempt are unfounded, as Microsoft(tm) refuse to release a statement without the ability to apply 'patches' to it at later dates.
While at hospital the man went through many tests and scans, one of which being an x-ray, which is standard practice in head injuries, and the discovery of a brain was made. During further tests, mainly out of interest of the staff, no brain damage was discovered, however the brain did not function properly. When asked about this the man informed us here at the daily bored, "as part of our training we must install new software to our selfs"
We have reason to believe that this new software 'designed' to keep the staff loyal to Microsoft(tm) corrupted the individuals original drivers designed to allow safe, efficient and correct interface with his brain, installing instead Microsoft(tm) drivers. We also believe a glitch in these drivers caused the man to pick the second floor in his believed suicide attempt.		  
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